I am a dramatic wus

I am no fan of discomfort and my pain tolerance is lower than a 3 year old toddler.  When I was little and had no idea of how anything worked I thought I was literally going to die when I was running and got out of breath.  In my primary school I refused to run because I thought being out of breath is a sign that I had heart disease and from all indication that I saw on TV on HK, one minute the old guys are gasping for breath, the next thing you know, the dudes are tumbling over and are shortly hospitalized. The one time I tried to do some situps and light exercise I felt sore the next day and bitched about how much it hurt for a whole week afterward and pretty much decided that being active was not for me from that point forward.  I have a distinct memory of telling my PE teacher that I can't overexert myself because I had heart disease and being laughed at. Not only that, the callous bitch also shared this tidbit with other teachers and had them laughing at me too.  HK teachers are normally humorless and joyless except for when they can derive humor and joy from innocent children's suffering and humiliation. 

Now that I am a grown ass woman I have a better understanding and know that I won't actually expire when I exercise, but it does not mean that my tolerance for discomfort has developed in any way.  To add to this mix, I am aware of more potential ailments that I could be having. Luckily, I have a good friend who is a MD now and can call her to discuss my problems.  There was this one time I thought I was literally expiring and wouldn't make it through the night and I called her and she told me I had gas.  We had a contentious debate because I was convinced that I had something far more grave like a failed kidney or pancreas or cancer and she would regret her shitty diagnosis when it ends up being terminal.  But then the gas attack passed and I was ok and so I hung up went back to bed.  A few months ago I thought I had brain lesions (it was a sprained ankle, long story, and I ended up in the wrong so no need to go there). Last month I thought I might have carpal tunnel because I had these blinding, shooting pains in my wrist. I think Dr. Friend is pretty sick of my complaints, esp regarding pain since she has a damn high pain tolerance herself and anyone possessing less than that was just being a pussy.  Although she is normally very empathetic, she does not consider pain a real illness.  This is someone who once broke up with a dood b/c he winced when he sprained his ankle.

My awareness that I over-react to my pains, injuries and ailments does not stop me from dramatization.  This week I am doing thumb position exercises on the cello and since I don't have calluses built up on my thumb yet, the piercing pain literally makes me sweat, wimper and cus. It might just look like a thumb sliding up and down the string, but this is how it actually feels.

Photo from The Empire Strikes Back

For those of you who don't know, this is Luke Skywalker after getting the shit beaten out of him by Darth Vader and on top of getting his ass kicked, his hand gets sliced off and that's why he only has a stump on his right and his hand is floating with a sad unlit light saber handle near the middle of the screen.  You can tell from the face he's making that he is not boyfriend material for my Dr. Friend.